Oh the Places You'll Go!

Growing up, I never thought much of Dr. Seuss.  He was never my childhood favorite.  Yes, I could recite "Are You My Mother?" and the infamous "Green Eggs and Ham" with the best of them, but I completely underestimated the power of the author's message.  And then in high school I was introduced to the best picture book of ALL TIME.  Wait for it..."Oh the Places You'll Go!"  If you haven't read it, stop reading this blog and get yourself to your nearest library.  Have a seat in one of those tiny chairs covered in little kid germs, and get ready to be inspired!  The basic storyline revolves around a life's journey.  Dr. Seuss tells us that things in your life are going to go great!  "Wherever you fly, you'll be the best of the best.  Wherever you go, you will top all the rest."  And then Dr. Seuss gets real.  This doesn't often happy in children's stories.  This is so NOT a Disney movie.  Because just when you start to believe the good Dr. he bursts your bubble with THIS news.  "Except when you don' t.  Because, sometimes, you won't.  I'm sorry to say so but, sadly, it's true that hang-ups and bang-ups can happen to you.  You can get all hung up in a prickle-ly perch.  And your gang will fly on.  You'll be left in a Lurch.  You'll come down from the Lurch with an unpleasant bump.  And the chances are, then, that you'll be in a Slump.  And when you're in a slump, you're not in for much fun.  Un-slumping yourself is not easily done."  Ohhhh Dr. Seuss you don't have to tell me about the un-slumping.  I know exactly what you're talking about!  See, it's like Dr. Seuss wrote this book FOR ME specifically.  MAGICAL. 

So you continue reading and you discover that somehow you'll unslump youself, because Dr. Seuss says you will.  And I believe him!  Because in the end he asks, "And will you succeed?"  I don't know! I don't know!  Tell me. I'm dying.to.know.  HOW CAN YOU KNOW?  And he says,  "Yes! You will, indeed!  (98 and 3 / 4 percent guaranteed.)  KID, YOU'LL MOVE MOUNTAINS!"  Well I don't know about you, but a 98 and 3/4 percent guarantee that I will survive the next few weeks and maybe even move a MOUNTAIN sounds pretty damn good to me!

  

The funny thing about this book is that I picked it to read to my kindergarten class on my last day with them.  I wanted to inspire them to be the best little five-year-old versions of themselves they can be.  I wanted them to know that I believe in them, and that they should also believe in themselves.  Not once did I stop to think, am I doing this for me?  And then I started reading it.  And the kids had no idea what Dr. Seuss was saying.  Because they are FIVE and they just liked the funny pictures.  And they didn't understand that life is one hell of a journey...YET.  But I sure do.  I barely finished reading the book to my class without sobbing.  When it was over the kids asked if it was time for cupcakes yet, clearly they were impacted! While I took a deep cathartic breathe and felt the best I have in weeks.  I looked at the three moms standing in the back of the room.  Great moms, who have supported me through this process even though I'm disrupting their kids' lives and leaving them in the lurch.  And all three moms were crying.  Because Dr. Seuss didn't write this book for kids.  He wrote it for adults.  And I cannot thank him enough, because it was exactly the motivational speech I needed to get through the day.  And I am now 98 and 3/4 percent sure I am embarking on the adventure of a lifetime.

Update

I thought I'd update you on the latest in my life.  For the past three weekends Rick and I have been combing the Vail Valley in search of a home.  We were shocked to discover that good old mountain folk have the mentality of 1950s midwestern suburbanites.  Case and point: we would call on a condo and talk to the owner.  We'd ask for a showing that afternoon and he/she would respond, "Oh, just head on over.  The key is in the lockbox and the code is 5428.  Let me know if you like it!" (Insert look of shock and awe here.)  What do you mean head on over and enter a code?  Without you?  Is this a trick?  I must say it made the whole process  a lot more fun.  You could really look around and have honest conversations with each other about a place without waiting until the owner was out of earshot.  At one place, we spent 20 minutes trying to figure out how to turn on the showers.  You know you've watched too must HGTV when your initial reaction is, "This is a fake shower!  There's nothing behind this wall- no pipes!  They're trying to screw us!"  Rick even started knocking on the tile...listening for an echo??  Come to find out the place was newly remodeled and the wrong faucets had been installed.  The owner was thankful we had been so thorough with our inspection:-) Or, she thought we were crazy.  Either way she was too nice to say so!

I think our most popular phrase while driving through the mountains has been, "These people are so nice!"  By the end of our first house hunting weekend we could have gone into business on the black market selling appliances.  That is how many owners let us into their homes without them.  I think I've found a new career path!  From Kindergarten teacher to professional robber, if only I had no morals!

I've started my last week at Side Creek!   Just saying that seems surreal!  I had a great Field Day with the kids last Friday.  I'm so glad I was able to be around for that.  It is truly my favorite day of the year!  Parents were shocked by my enthusiasm and passion for the day.  If only they'd seen me on Field Day in Elementary School...I loved collecting ribbons!  It's always hilarious to see the kids who haven't quite grasped the concept of a race.  You'd think you had just asked them to go clean their rooms with the lack of urgency they felt towards completing the relay.  My competitive streak was screaming on the inside for a little bit of effort!  But alas, it's all about the fun these days and not about the score!

I've started injections again.  It's only one a day, and I've been giving them to myself!  That doesn't sound like much, but trust me it's everything!

Lots on the plate the next few weeks.  Rick and I are looking forward to Thanksgiving:-)

DIng, Ding, Ding Round 12: FIGHT

I wish there was a word that encompassed what it feels like to be genuinely elated for your husband because he rocks at his job and got yet ANOTHER promotion, yet conversely, utterly terrified because it means you have to give up your job in two weeks to move an hour and a half away from your dearest friends and family to live in the mountains where you know no one.  In short: I'm overwhelmed.

They say God doesn't ever throw anything your way that you can't handle.  I always believed that about OTHER people and their problems:-)  But I thought I was at problem max capacity about four problems ago.  In fact I started this blog because I was having trouble "handling things."  And now my present self is laughing at that past self thinking, "You thought THAT was bad a few weeks ago.  CHECK THIS OUT!  Now you're moving to the mountains in the winter, you hate snow, and you don't ski!  Now, you're going to be jobless and forced to take up knitting! Now you're going to have to pack up your house after six months of unpacking and start all over again!  It's like being punched out in a boxing ring.  I'm done.  I'm out.  I see stars.  Someone drag me out of the ring, cover my wounds with Vaseline to stop the bleeding, and squirt water in my mouth until I regain consciousness.  Is that dramatic enough for you?!  It's OK, this is free therapy, remember?  I'm allowed to sound crazy during therapy so that I don't DO anything crazy.  I hope it's working!

Seriously though, I can rationalize the move and know it is a good thing.  I am so proud of my husband and his career success.  It's great for our family and hopefully one day we'll have children to guilt trip about how hard this journey has been!  They might need the REAL therapy:-)

Logistically, It's going to be tough.  I am supposed to complete my transfer October 18th-19th which means for the next month I will be doing daily injections, estrogen patches, and suppositories (gross).  I was hoping for some hormonal stability during this process, but no such luck.  I'll need two days of bed rest after the transfer, so let's hope the movers don't charge extra for moving a bed complete with a psychotic pregnant lady inside.

I have two weeks to pack up my classroom and say goodbye to my students.  I'll probably care more about saying goodbye to them, then they will be to say adios to me.  Let's face it, you remember about two things from these early years and I'll be lucky if one of their memories includes me!   But, saying goodbye to my colleagues is going to be a whole lot harder than I originally thought.  I already had the "talk" with my boss.  She could not have been more supportive and that means the world to me.  I've had teary eyed conversations with a few close friends from work, and know saying our actual goodbyes will be difficult.  At least I know I'll be back at the end of April to pack up my classroom and visit.

Then there are the friends that are nearly impossible to say goodbye to.  Friends who you've spent hours planning for the future with.  Friends you have consoled through the toughest times in their lives and who have stood beside you through your darkest hours.  Irreplaceable friends.  Obviously, I don't want to be overly dramatic about it (too late??).  I'm moving an hour and a half away, not traveling to Tallahassee, Florida!  But friends are everything, and I will miss mine dearly.  It isn't until they're being taken away that you are forced to realize how much they define who you are and who you strive to be.  No matter how detailed our plans for the future, sometimes you don't get to call the shots.  It will be difficult to begin this journey without you guys (you know who you are!) but know that I love you and I've put Rick in charge of finding a three bedroom place for you:-)

This is probably not a blog you should keep reading if you're looking for uplifting stories involving puppies or rainbows!  Although I promise to write just such a post the day I find out I'm pregnant!  As for now, I've just lost control of a lot of things in my life, and for you Virgos out there you know just how horrifying that is.  I really do appreciate the calming effects of blog writing.  And I plan on using it to help me get through these next couple of months and beyond.  So bear with me.  I am fairly confident I will come out on top!  I'm regrouping in my corner of the ring.  I'm hydrating and talking strategy with Coach Fendell.  Lucky for me, he's great at the pep talks.

Specific Directions Necessary

As a kindergarten teacher I'm acutely aware of the need to provide SPECIFIC directions to my students to ensure my desired result.  Or so I thought...

Today a student asked me if he could please use the restroom.  Actually it sounded more like, "ease use estoom?"  I told him he could go and continued on with my teaching.  After aboout 15 minutes had gone by I noticed that this student had not returned.  NEVER A GOOD SIGN.  The last time that happened I found out (much too late) that the boy had pooped on the floor and then decided that was not right and he should clean it up himself.  The grout in the bathroom is now brown.  So needless to say my palms started to sweat as I approached that closed door.  Please don't let it be poop.  Please don't let it be poop.  ANYTHING BUT POOP!  Assuming the worst, I took a deep breathe and vowed not to breathe again until I knew it was absolutely not poop! Shockingly, it was not!  However, I did find a most interesting scene...

First of all, the sink was FULL of water.  And by full, I mean he had plugged the drain, turned the water on high, watched it fill to the top and thought, "I should let this spill over and land on the floor.  That would be fun!"  Because water was all over the floor.  Upon further inspection, the child was also soaking wet.  Not only were his clothes drenched (shoes and all) but his face was covered with water as were his bangs!  This is what I think his thought process was:  I don't feel like listening to Mrs. Fendell rant and rave about the importance of becoming a lifelong writer.  Who needs to learn about the writing process anyway?  The real adventure is in the bathroom where there's water!  I'm going to fill the sink with that water.  Then I'm going to let it keep running and spill all over the floor.  Once the floor is good and wet, I'll stomp around in it,  jumping in the puddles I've made.  And in case I get thirsty, I'll drink it like a dog from the sink!  I will continue playing this fun game until someone catches me.

I know this is exactly what he was thinking because when I walked in the bathroom he was drinking out of the sink LIKE A DOG.

 WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!  Nothing.  WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! I don't know.  THERE IS WATER ALL OVER THE FLOOR AND YOU'RE DRINKING OUT OF THE SINK!  Blank stare.  CLEAN THIS UP NOW!  ***This is the point in the story where I should have know better.  This is when very specific directions would have come in handy.  Clearly, this student needed them.  But instead I said CLEAN THIS UP NOW!  I didn't tell him HOW to clean it up or give him anything to clean it up with!  I think I was shocked.  Yes, I'm blaming shock.  I'm also blaming the relief I felt that "at least it wasn't poop." Shame on you Mrs. Fendell.

About five minutes later, I returned to see how the "clean up" was going.  The sink was now empty-success.  But the floor was now COVERED in soap water he was using to "clean up" the floor just like I'd asked.  The peach colored floor was now bubble white.  And the boy was now sitting on the bubble floor, which meant his pants were now covered in soap.  Deep breathe.  This was SO my fault.

This time I learned from my mistakes.  I ripped a few hundred paper towels from the dispenser and demonstrated how to dry the floor, just like a good teacher would.  And this time he got the hint.

You win some, you lose some, but at least it wasn't poop.