MOPS has officially started again which means I get two and a half uninterrupted adult only hours complete with coffee (decaf for me thanks), free breakfast, and daycare right upstairs! I also go for the great speakers and occasional craft, but mostly I go to sit in peace and pee whenever I want.
This morning's topic was about the importance of sharing your family story with your children. There was a study done at Emery that showed children who could answer 20 questions about their families such as "Where did your parents go to high school?" and "Where were your grandparents born" are overall more successful and grounded in their lives because they've grown up belonging to something bigger than themselves. And it wasn't just about knowing the answers, but about how those answers were learned be it bed time stories, around the dinner table, on a family vacation...these were all seen as providing this unbreakable resilience in children in the face of adversity or tough times.
I can definitely see how this has played an important role in my life. I always knew there were a multitude of family members who loved me, cared for me, worked hard for me, and sacrificed for me. They were they to cheer on my successes as well as share in my disappointment at the losses. And let us not forget, you never wanted to screw up too badly because you'd have to answer to Grandma! Ultimately the bigger family unit is what you fall back on and it's those quirky family traditions that create a unique bond amongst family members that cannot be broken. Throughout childhood we often can't or don't appreciate these amazing traditions. But as a collage student I remember feeling starved for attention to these family nuances created over the years. Suddenly a Wiltfang Christmas with everyone present at Grandma's house was not desired but necessary. Cutting down a Christmas tree with my family even if it was the only one left in the forest and was missing branches from my waist down was mandatory because it's what we did every year. These traditions become our story and shape who we are as people.
It was nice to be reminded that even in these early years as parents when I'd sometimes like to exit the roller coaster that is my two-year-olds emotional self, I am responsible for creating stories with him. And if I don't do it, someone else will. It can be hard to live in the moment and enjoy when there are dishes over flowing in the sink and I'm wearing my last pair of clean underwear, but ultimately taking the time to eat a meal together or share a bed time story will resonate with Charlie in the years to come. Feeling blessed to be reminded of the gift of story telling this morning. I normally go for the coffee, but today I walked away from MOPS with a renewed vision of my job as a mom.
